There’s a fire, a fierce one.
It’s nestled inside of my heart; it yearns as it burns.
It flickers, splutters and roars.
But there’s another one.
Outside in the world:
One that scorches all that it touches as it burns.

And tonight,
I accept both of them,
I accept them.

I accept that a fire burns in me
and that another burns the world.
I looked for absolution but tonight,
I know that I shall never find it.
I accept the smoke.

I will spend hours watching dusk melt into night
and night into that unimposing dawn.
I will look for stars, and sometimes
I’ll find them.
As I will the northern lights, and
every explosion of blue, green and white.

I accept that man, woman and child shall suffer:
Of their own accord and
by Lottery.
I tried to make sense of the world, its order
but tonight I know that I shall never find it.
I accept the noise.

I will lose the lines I liked the most
from books, poems and prose.
But I will remember that ineffable emotion which stayed
with me after reading them, holding each close.
As I will the humility felt towards an unknown hand and
the universe at large.

I accept that all that we touch, feel and see is ephemeral:
a ripple in the tide of time.
I searched for the Point Of It All but tonight I know
that I shall never find it.
I accept the sands.

I will walk as far as my own two feet
carry me.
I will be enslaved by music and lust,
and the restless wind in your letterbox.
As I will be by the sigh on your lips
(that unyielding confidence laced with tacit longing)
and
the smell of your skin
(that freshly baked something made off a clay oven).

There’s a fire, a fierce one.
And tonight, I begin.

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